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Transportation

Transportation jokes

One day, the Pope is coming to America in his limo, and he said to the driver, "Why don’t you let me drive for once?"

The driver thinks to himself, "Well, I can’t say no to this guy; he’s the Pope." So the driver pulls over, and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while, the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, "Slow down a bit; you might get pulled over."

The Pope says, "Ahhh, don’t worry about it; I’m the Pope." So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments, he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car, and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, "Oh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute?"

The Pope says, "Sure." The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, "Guys, I just pulled over someone really important."

They ask who, "The President?"

"No, more important."

"The president of another country?"

"No, more important."

"An ambassador?"

"No, even more important."

"Well, who is it?"

"I don’t know, but the Pope is the chauffeur."

What can an elevator do that an orphan’s parents can’t?

The elevator can raise a family.

If you give someone a plane ticket, they will fly for a day, but if you push them out of a plane, they'll fly for the rest of their life.

By the time I ran my wife over with my car, I had to stop for gas twice.

Your mama is so fat, by the time I swerved to miss her with the car, I ran out of gas.

Do you know why people in wheelchairs don’t pay for them?

Because they have to pay for road tax.

If a fat person were to go on a flying car, it will just be at the ground. When they exit, it will just fly up.

Q: What did the terrorist say during a plane flight? A: “Wow! This flight is the bomb!”