Toy jokes

Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?

Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.

Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.

I like playing with Yoyos, because at least they always come back.

What does Joe Biden call a room full of kids? A toy room.

I got a new Lego airplane set from my friend... oddly, there were also two towers included in the box as well.

What do you call a toy that has a story?

Toy Story.

"Hey, don’t take my toy! What are you going to tell your parents?"

Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"

Why was the kinetic sand always happy?

Because it was kinetic with its friends!

I have a little John.

I gave a blind kid a hand grenade and told him it's a beyblade.

I bought a wooden whistle, but it wooden whistle.

So I bought a steel whistle, but it steel wooden whistle.

So THEN I bought a LED whistle but it steel wooden LED me whistle.

It's important to wash your sex toys.

That's why priests invented baptism.

What did the orphan's friend give him for his birthday?

Lego, so he can build a home.

What do you call a stripper in a wheelchair?

Hot wheels.

My friend put an action toy and called it Kobe and put it on a drone. I realized that my friend didn't know how to fly a drone.

What do teenage girls and happy meals have in common?

They both come with a toy.

How are boobs and toys similar?

Both were originally made for kids, but dads usually end up playing with them.

Balls are annoying. They just bounce and never keep still.

What’s the rarest gun to find in Africa?

A water gun...

What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?

Hot Wheels.