Toy jokes
Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?
Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂
Why is it that orphans love Frisbees so much?
Because they return eventually.
George, when I saw your face, I had to shoot you with a Nerf gun. If you died, wimp.
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa? Cause they make the toys.
How do you know the baby's dead? The dog plays with it more.
What do you call a kid on a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
What's the Pixar movie close to being a pornstar? Toy Story... *I got a friend in me*
You know it's so hard to clean my sex toys. Thank you, Jesus, for creating baptism.
Why did the little girl cry twice?
Because you wiped your bloody shitty cock on her favorite teddy bear.
Yo momma is so ugly, she made my Happy Meal cry.
"Hey, don’t take my toy! What are you going to tell your parents?"
Wacko Jacko bleached his skin, lit his head on fire, slept in a chamber, abused his pet monkey, built an amusement park in his own backyard, had toys as decor for his home, slept with little boys, raped little boys. Jacko was Florida Man before Florida Man.
Q: Why was Barbie kicked out of the toy box?
A: She sat on Pinocchio's face and said, "Lie to me!"
What's the difference between a baby and a ball?
If you inflate the ball, it won't explode.
One day an orphan threw a boomerang, but it came back, just like its parents.
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."
Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."
So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.
Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"
The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?
They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed.
Police Report: Looking for a female, light brown hair, blue eyes, freckles, and a small scar on her right check.
Last seen on CCTV wearing see-through bottoms, a pink top, and a vibrating dildo hanging out of her arse. If you find this woman, please get her to charge the dildo for excessive fun.