Why do Chinese people hate Christmas? Because they make the toys.
What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a Catholic priest?
One goes limp when a child walks in the room.
Father: I am taking your toys to the orphanage.
Son: Why?
Father: You’ll need them there.
What did they give Elmo before he left the factory? Two test-tickles.
What does a Rubik's cube and a man's penis have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in a different box.
When Michael Jackson died, people melted him down into Lego pieces so that little kids could play with him instead.
What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?
They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.
What's the difference between a girl and a toy? There is no difference because you play with both anyway.
What did one brick say to the other? Never LEGO.
Sex dolls are alive in the Toy Story universe.
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa? Cause they make the toys.
What's a priest's favorite toy?
A mute little boy.
What’s the rarest gun to find in Africa?
A water gun...
Do you know you’re supposed to wash your sex toys after you use them?
I guess that’s why Catholics invented baptism.
Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?
Because they're the ones making the toys.
There is an Afghan Barbie; it’s a blow-up doll.
Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?
Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.
Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.
Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"
I like playing with Yoyos, because at least they always come back.
