Worst Jokes Ever
I got my husband a fridge for his birthday. His face lit up when he opened it.
Why did the orphan fail all his classes?
He couldn’t do his homework.
So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.
There’s also one about a bowling ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though. I'll research that.
Q: What does encyclopedia mean by cut them in triple?
A: Encyclopedia, more like "An Cyclone Media!"
Why do orphans love boomerangs?
They always come back.
What's worse, being loved or hated? 'Cause when you're loved you could be left alone or be betrayed, but when you're hated no one's there to leave you. What do you think?
You're so full of shit that the toilet's jealous.
My sister thinks she's sooooo smart. She said that the only food that makes you cry is onions, therefore I threw a coconut at her.
Don’t feel bad about this day because there’s a saying: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."
China shouldn't play baseball because that would take out the whole world with one bat.
My 1 year old nephew had a stroke. I know, sounds bad... but he would have needed to learn how to speak and walk anyways.
Hey man, I was gonna tell a joke about 9/11, but it was just plane.
Here’s one for the Aussies: What’s the difference between an echidna and a police car? All the pricks are on the inside.
Emo girls be like, "How much am I worth?"
Girl, scan the code on your wrist.
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.
His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"
The twins are falling down.
Moby Dick's father's name...
Papa Boner.
What does a plug do when he's horny?
He jacks off!
Finish the lyrics: Can I put my...