What’s the difference between a hooker and a cat?
I haven’t banged a hooker.
Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the frog take the bus to work today?
His car got toad away.
You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.
Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning?
It has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
Q: Why can't pilots play Jenga?
A: Because they will just hit the Twin Towers.
My ex-wife misses me, but her aim is getting better.
"Osama bin Laden playing MW2 Air Strike inbound."
James Bond: Vodka martini.
Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?
I saw a girl crying. I asked her, "Where are your parents?" She cried as I got kicked out of the orphanage.
Why did the lonely fish get a detention? Because he left the school.
A man marries a blonde chick, lives a happy life together, and the man asks his wife if she wants kids. She says "yes".
So, a couple of years go by, and they have one boy and one girl. They go to school, go home with their report cards, and the dad asks what their grades were. The son says he's not doing well, same with the daughter. They ask why they're doing so bad in school, and the dad replies with "ask your mother that question!"
Where do you buy cows in bulk?
At the stock market.
What's the difference between a blind person and an orphan?
They both can't see their parents.
Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"
The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"
BOINGZINGA!?!
What did the tree say to the emo kid? Wanna hang?
Worst joke Ever: What do you call a fat kom? A FAT MOM! LALALALLA!
DARK ALERT********
A girl went to the doctor. The doctor said she had one year to live. She shot the doctor, and the judge gave her 15 years.
DARK ALERT********
I told an orphan his dad is Spider-Man: Far From Home.
My mom is bad and my dad is bad.
Delyla is a bitch.
