Worst Jokes Ever
How to commit arson:
1. Burn down an orphanage.
Why did the alarm go off when the emo and his friends left the store when they checked everything out?
The emo forgot to roll his sleeves up.
Why is it everyone wants to rub a pregnant woman's stomach but never the man's balls where the baby actually came from and the real ones that deserve the congratulations?
The first thing the emo did at the party is to pin the gun to their head.
"I’m on a hunt for my wife’s murderer, have been for years."
"Oh my God! Your wife’s been murdered?!"
"No no, you misunderstand. I’m still looking for him."
TV: SCHOOL SHOOTING 13 DIED.
Father: Guns cause all these problems!
Kid playing FNAF security breach *bang* *Bang*
Kid: WOLF PU&EY WOLF PU^$Y WOLF PU*#Y
What did the terrorist think to himself seconds before hitting the tower?
"Did I leave the stove on?"
Roses are red, violets are blue, Pornhub is down, your mum's Facebook will do.
Why are emos like paper?
They cut easily.
Q: What happens when emos make out?
A: They don't; they just hang out.
What music do depressed people listen to?
"I Believe I Can Fly."
How do you bury a prostitute?
In a Y-shaped coffin.
What’s the best way to make sure you don’t get COVID?
Suicide.
Your life literally is as valuable as a summer ant. I'm just gonna stomp you, you're gonna keep coming back, I'm gonna seal up all my cracks, you're gonna keep coming back, why? Cause you keep smelling the syrup, you worthless bitchass nlgga! You're gonna stay on my dick until you die. You serve no purpose in life, your purpose in life is to be on my stream sucking on my dick daily. Your purpose in life is to be in that chat blowing a dick daily. Your life is nothing, you serve ZERO purpose. You should kill yourself, NOW! And give somebody else a piece of that oxygen and ozone layer that's covered up so we can breathe inside this blue trapped bubble. Cause what are you here for? To worship me? Kill yourself! I mean that with a hundred percent with a thousand percent.
Why are handicap signs blue? Because they're all Crips. (sorry)
When I die I want to have a piece of paper near me giving a clue on how I died, like, "I want everyone to miss me except for this bullet," or, "You didn't hang with me but guess what did?"
Lol, these jokes have been heard millions of times.
What Did Iran Say To Oman?
"Oh man, I ran out of ideas!"
What do a pimp and a farmer have in common?
They both need a hoe to stay in business.
Question: What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Answer: Dam.