Worst Jokes Ever

Not a joke, but this needs saying. Please can someone do something about all the pedo posts on here. It’s honestly just nasty.

How do you call a Goth with feelings?

Emomotional.

Aha!

When your gf tells you to treat her like a queen,

and then you remember you’re French.

Why can’t orphans be gay?

They have nobody to call "daddy."

When you're at school and you have to wipe your ass, but it's only one ply...

Your finger breaks through... mmm, finger lickin' good.

I wish I could follow you, though.

But you need an account so I could follow you, but you don't have one. :'(

I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.

I needn't have bothered.

The next day, it was smeared all over my face.

What's the best thing about Switzerland?

I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.

What is an orphan's favorite store? Home Depot.

I just donated $100 to a blind children's charity, suck that no one will see it.

Why does an orphan play mum and dad?

'Cause they need self-love.

These jokes are darker than the list of victims dead from cops.

You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."

You're so bald that when you wear a poncho, you look like a broken condom.

Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.

Orphan: But why?

I pushed a disabled kid into a fire and roared, "Hot wheels!"

Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.

The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...

If the captain of the Titanic was dumb, he would eat the iceberg.

What do you call a bald Mexican?

A huevo.