Best Jokes - Page 28 - Worst Jokes Ever

What can an Olympic runner do that Hitler can't?

Finish a race.

What's the difference between an Afghan kindergarten and a military target?

The drone guy didn't know either.

I encountered a milf at a bar last night. Although she is 57 years old, she is still very charming and sexy.

We were drinking, chatting, laughing, and having a good time.

Then, she asked me flirtatiously,

"Have you ever tried a mother-daughter threesome before?"

I said, "Nope, not yet."

She drank a little more, and said, "Well, darling, tonight is your lucky night."

So she took me to her place.

She took out her keys, opens her door, turns on the light, and she yells towards upstairs,

"Mom, are you still awake?"

A girl asked me to eat her out one time... so I put her in the oven.

I hate likebeggars. They are just writing some stupid "like if" shit just to get attention. I mean, that's so lazy, so unoriginal, and stupid.

Anyways, can this get 100 likes, please?

If the formula of water is H2O, then what is the formula of ice?

H2O cubed.

If a fly loses its wings, is it now a walk? Wait a minute, I found out a mind blower. So the 🌎 is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn't that mean all countries are called the 3rd country of 🌎? If I get 10 likes, I'll do one mind-blowing fact daily.

Brian has a crush on a cute girl, Sally, from school, so he goes and tells his dad about her, and he says, "Sorry, son, you can't like her; she is your sister." So Brian is okay with it, and he starts to like another girl, Madison, and he goes up to his dad and says, "I have a crush on this girl, Madison," and again the dad goes, "Oh, sorry, son, you can't like any girl in school; they are all your sisters." So he goes crying to his mom and says, "Dad said I can't like any girl because they are all my sisters," and the mom goes, "Oh, it's okay; you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad."

"I know that everyone is allowed to act stupid once in a while, but you’re really abusing that privilege."

What's a Mexican's favorite sport?

Cross country.

I went to my boss's funeral and knelt down to his coffin and whispered, "Whose late now?"

Give a like if I have no friends.

I kicked a soccer ball at the kid in the wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.

Q. What's long, hard, and scary when you first see it?

A. Calculus homework.

I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he's a really deep sleeper.

I don't get why cancer is so hard to beat. I'm already on stage 4.

Me at the Oscars when I see Jada Pinkett Smith, I said: "G.I. Jane 2, more like G.I. Jada 2, can't wait to see it."

So Will Smith is laughing and then suddenly, Will Smith walks up to me and punches me in the face.

Me: "Ow, oh, wow. Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me.” My nigga Smith goes: "KEEP MY WIFE'S NAME OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" Me: "Maybe you should focus on keeping her friends out of hers."