Worst Jokes Ever

I like my women thick, so if they aren't over 375 pounds, they're not stepping into my room.

Someone was crushing a bag of chips. I said, "Are you making edibles?"

My friend Arid asked me what I did over the weekend. I told him, "I read."

Get it? I read? No... ok.

My mother said I'm sexy. I said no, I have cancer.

Oof, you're gay!

"Dustin Jordan Manna should have been an abortion."

Me and my friends were talking. Then we started talking about our wives. I said, "So, I married a volcano for a wife. You never know when she will blow up."

Hi, my name is Crappy. I like tacos and more tacos and more tacos and more tacos and more tacos and more tacos and ya now GET LOST!

Dark humor is like a kid with cancer. It never gets old.

Why was the egg runny?

Because he'd just had sex with Jimmy Saville.

Q: How did we learn cats don't land on their feet?

A: We asked Mufasa from the Lion King.

What did the cannibal say to the other?

"Can I practise on you?"

I have the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban at the New York Zoo.

What's the difference between a boomerang and my dad?

My dad came back!

You’ll need a bib when you’re done eating my ribs.

You might be innocent, but if you carry a large sum of cash in public, the cops won’t believe that.

Why did Stephen Hawking die? His ethernet cable fell out.

What did the kid with cancer say? "Can-I see my mom one more time?"

Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of CRACK.

What is a baby's favorite song?

"Baby" by Justin Bieber.