Worst Jokes Ever
20 years later
Johnny: Hey dad.
Dad: Yea?
Johnny: Fuck you, I ain't comin' back to your grave in 16 years, then ima come back, BITCH!
Dad: Doing the same thing I did to you and your mother, ay? I deserve it :( ;O not real...NOT A FUCKING ALL.
Johnny: Yea you kinda fucking do.
Dad:...
Why did 10 run away?
Now it's 8, 9/11.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To show he had guts.
Why did the other hedgehog cross the road? To see his flat mate.
You are so ugly Santa goes "ho ho ho holy sh*t."
What do 9/11 and 911 have in common?
They're twins.
What does a school bus crash and a train crash have in common?
They always line up.
On my Tinder profile, I said, "I prefer quality over quantity." I just thought it sounded nicer than saying "no fat birds."
What was the last thing to go through Princess Diana’s head before she died?
The steering wheel.
Which nut has won the World Cup the most times? A Brazil nut.
What do you call a nut with a hairy upper lip?
A mustach-io!
Wanna hear a funny joke?
You
What do you call a group of Indians that eat curry all the time?
The Munch Bunch.
Why do orphans not know Dom Toretto?
Dom Toretto cares about family.
What cigarettes does Churchill's wife like to smoke?
Blue Winston.
What happens when the terminator pees?
Gasoline descent.
Why do orphans have water in cereal?
Because mom was never around to produce milk.
I know where you live! I saw you before!
You're so ugly, Hello Kitty said goodbye.
Mommy kisses my butt.
What do you call a fish with no neck?