Worst Jokes Ever
I put peanut butter on my asshole so the dog would lick it, but instead I got bit by ants.
Why did the chicken cross to the U.S. from Mexico?
To get to the U.S., but he had to show his papers first.
So three retards walk into a classroom...
Sike, it was the garbage. They mistook it for their classroom.
A NASA scientist is sitting in a bar when a Martian walks in and orders a martini.
The NASA scientist quickly realizes he is dreaming and wakes up. He turns to his wife and tries to explain the dream, but she rolls over and ignores him because she is tired of listening to him.
The NASA scientist begins to sob because his marriage is in shambles. lmao.
Why were the Twin Towers sad?
They ordered Dominos and got Jets.
I say 123, yeah, the kids bullied me, but they really don't know that my dad has a gun, yeah.
This for you roman y e e e nt
According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.
- That girl was hot. - She's my cousin!
Murder: Wanna play a game?
Me: Ok (pulls out Xbox controller)
How do you get 100 dead babies into a tub? Put them in the blender.
How do you get them out of the tub? Give mexicans tortilla chips and tell them theres salsa in the tub.
Condoms are for pussies.
What a world we live in. Now we’re making jokes about anorexic people.
I like your mama's big butt, and I cannot lie.
Religion
Do you know how babies are made? The boy puts his penis in the girl's butt and goes up and down for ten minutes. Then the girl takes a pregnancy test, and if it says no, then you keep doing it until she is pregnant.
The boy will lick the girl down there, and she will put his penis in her mouth and suck it. Then he will spit on his hand and rub it on her boobs and lick/suck them.
Why does Adam go hockey, you might ask?
In my opinion, he shouldn't go because he is bad, but he needs the armor to protect himself from his own step-dad.
Hi, Charlie, is your friend?
What did the boy say to the noose?
"Can you please tie me."
What do you call an epileptic in a swimming pool? A dishwasher.
If Joey Deacon made his own company, it would be called The Joey Deacon Company; Walt Disney should have a run for its money.
P.S. The Joey Deacon Pictures logo would have some autistic people making noises to "When You Wish Upon A Star", with the castle being the Blue Peter ship instead.