Worst Jokes Ever
Nuts, nuts, nuts!
What did the squash say to the tomato?
Ketchup!
When it is quiet when you're having sex and you ask your partner to "Do the roar!"
Stephen Hawking couldn't make it to Heaven because there were stairs, so he rolled down to Hell.
Q) What did the airplane say to the little boy?
A) Nothing, airplanes don't talk!
Alright, my sister is ALWAYS dancing randomly all the time, and what I say is, "Go get you boyfriend, dude!"
Do you want to hear a joke about paper?
Never mind, it's tear-able.
This is my fidget spinner, I got it in my Easter basket.
You are American when you walk into the bathroom, and you are American when you walk out.
But do you know what you are when you're in the bathroom? European.
My child is ungrateful. I got him a bike for Christmas and he didn't say thank you. No, he said, "Dad, I don't have any legs!"
How are Stephen Hawking and Kaepernick so much alike? They both don’t stand for the national anthem.
My favorite instrument? The TromBONE, of course.
What does a skeleton tile his roof with?
Shin-gles!
Have you ever tried sex when camping?
It's f***ing intense.
What do you get if you add "ER" onto Hamburg?
Hamburg-ER.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the “utter” side.
No one:
Literally no one:
Abraham Lincoln: *dies*
John Wilkes Booth: *ranks up*
My joke is about Archer, riddles, sex life. Wait, sorry, there is none.
Thanks for reading Archer’s love life story.
What's the difference between a nun and a prostitute taking a bath?
The nun has a soul full of hope...
Yo mama so fat, her swimming is Sea World.