Worst Jokes Ever
Your mom is so fat she won't be in a coffin when she dies. She won't fit in it.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the toilet? Because the “p” is silent.
My blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike. He should have been paying attention.
I fucked your girl.
I love how all these jokes about different accidents have happened, but why isn't anyone writing about how much of an accident we all were?
Once, I ate a skunk. It was hard because I didn't get it down the whole way.
What do cheetahs wear to work?
They can't change because cheetahs can't change their spots!
Rhydon- son.
Rhydon? - mum.
RHYDON DEEZ NUTS! - son.
Jeez, ur like ur father in bed- mum.
XD
Me and my cancer
Are like a game of Fortnite.
I’ll never win.
Why were the people during 9/11 mad? They ordered 2 sausage pizzas, but instead they got 2 plane pizzas.
What is a home that can fly?
A magic house!
Q: What did Jesus say when he got nailed to the cross?
A: Owwww!!!!!
I want to do Uranus. (tounge emoji) (wet emoji)
A man came running into a hospital saying, "Doctor, Doctor! I can't feel my legs!"
The doctor replied, "I know I amputated your arms!"
I live in a world made of cheese. Someone stubbed their toe and screamed, "Cheese-its, Christ!"
I’m posting this again cuz I can and cuz it got thumbs downs and cuz I’m bored. Stop being sensitive snowflakes and get a sense of humor. Geez.
What gun isn’t allowed in Africa? A water gun.
Steven Hawking died. I said, "Why? Did his wheelchair break?"
My brother truly is a numbskull.
Someone burgled my house the other day. It was terrible.
They ripped all of the front and back pages of my dictionaries. Things went from bad to worse.
If I had a dollar for every time someone did something stupid,
I would have approximately 7.8 Billion dollars.