Worst Jokes Ever
Why do orphans love playing baseball?
They can always run home.
Running out of time to cut the grass, may have to cut it short.
I was gonna stop for the cops, but I ran because I was high (the song don't copyright me plz).
Little Johnny and his mom were sitting in church one day when suddenly Johnny said, "Mom, I think I'm gonna throw up!"
Then his mom said, "Go across the field and into the bushes, hopefully no one will see you there."
Johnny comes back a minute later, and his mom asks, "Did you make it?" Then Johnny said, "No, but there was a box by the door that SAID 'For The Sick!'"
Why did the skeleton die from laughter?
'Cause they broke all his "funny bones!"
If Stephen Hawking was a boxer, he would roll with the punches.
Stephen Hawking is to wheelchairs like Uncle Ben is to rice.
If Carlsberg did wheelchairs...
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and his wheelchair?
At least his wheelchair can pull a woman.
What did Stephen Hawking say when he rode a bike?
"Hey look...no hands...or legs!"
At least he always has a shoulder to cry on.
What Stephen Hawking doesn't know about wheelchairs isn't worth knowing.
Can you really wheel my real wheelchair?
Try saying that over and over fast. Bit of a tongue twister.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite movie? Cabbage Patch Kids.
What does a pizza and a Mexican have in common?
One can feed a family.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
I went 80 mph in a school zone and one of the speed bumps screamed, "Am I hallucinating?"
What do you get when you cross a pig with a cactus? A porkupine!
What 16 stoner rode a Derby winner?
Lester Piggott's.
What 16 stoner rode a Derby winner?
Lester Piggott's cellmate.