Worst Jokes Ever

Why can’t a nose be 12 feet long?

Because then, it would be a foot.

What is the difference between a fat person and a whole pizza?

Well, a whole pizza cannot eat a fat person.

Kid singing “abcd.”

Person says, “No, no, it’s obcd.”

While I was waiting for your mum to waddle past, I missed a whole season of my TV show!

asdf.

I saw a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working at the orphanage!

When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!” So I started doing the same to them at funerals.

HELP! I MIGHT BE A RELIGIOUS EXTREMIST BECAUSE MY RHYMES ARE DA BOMB.

You're so skinny that you fall.

Your forehead [is] so big scientists measured it, studied it, and then finally they said: "Oh my God... your forehead is so big it's a 50 mile car ride from your eyebrows to your hair!"

Daryll

Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?

Mum: Shut up, son, you’ll wake your father!

What do you say if you want to borrow your black sister's foundation? "Got any lighter shades?"

Why did Justin Bieber start playing hide and seek with his fans?

Because they keepped.

What do me and an emo kid have in common:

We both like to hang.

What do you call a sad rabbit? Unhoppy.

Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji? To show that I am happy but I'm still cool.

Waitress: What can I get for you?

Me: I'll have a steak.

Waitress: How would you like it?

Me: Immediately!

Why did the sped kid get expelled?

Because he was tardy.

Husband: My wife and I went to the beach today.

Husband: She was wearing a blue wetsuit.

Husband: The second we entered the beach,

Pedestrians: "TSUNAMI! TSUNAMI!"

2001 called... they hit the Pentagon.