Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was out-standing.
Worst Jokes Ever
Dad: What did you learn in school today?
Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."
The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."
"Thanks Dad," the son says.
The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."
Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?
I once told a chemistry joke... sadly, it got no reaction.
My mom asked me if I was okay, so I replied, "I will be," and jumped out the window!
Have you ever seen a blind man swim?
Neither has he.
Why do orphans cry at insurance places?
They got offered the family plan.
Yo mama so fat that Will Smith could slap her from a mile away.
Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.
What does a cow say? Moo.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
He wanted to be wanted.
I have an exam next week, so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips.
Why is the rum gone?
My name is Ethan, and I don't find this funny.
What did the cow say to its udders? "Hi."
What's the difference between an onion and a baby? I only tear up cutting the onion.
Somebody told me to cheer up so.... I told him to pass me a rope :)
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Coff- na, jk, bleach.
Next time you see a Brit, go up to them and say:
"Imagine losing a 'Tea Party in Boston.'"
