Worst Jokes Ever
Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in the zoo, But don't you worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you!
Stephen Hawking couldn't take the stairway to Heaven, he had to take the lift.
I forgot my lucky egg! It always gives me an eggcellent amount of luck!
My grandma always loved to craft clothing. She dyed last week.
What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error.
How did the air beat me at chess? It did that thing, haha!
Why did the bike fall over?
'Cause it was wheely tired.
The only reason Stephen Hawking died is because he broke his charger.
How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!
What's Adam's biggest fear?
Andy with a belt.
What do you call a blonde?
A piss-head.
What happened to the egg after it went on the rollercoaster?
It was scrambled.
What is a spaceman’s favorite chocolate?
A Mars bar!
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home is.
A bear walks into a bar and asks the barkeep, "Can I have a grilled . . . cheese?"
The barkeep asks the bear, "What's with the big pause?" The bear says, "Well, I'm a bear."
What do you call a kid with no arms or legs?
Names......
Why couldn’t little Susie stay on the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Not Susie.
So I stayed at my friend's house for a few days, and I was like, "OMG, why?" So, I am going home because I’m going to my best friend's house.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
I was really rooting to tell that one.