Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a bullet head?
JFK.
What do you call a pool full of retards?
Vegetable soup.
Bitch wanna make me a sandwich?
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of dead babies.
Me: Hey Jim!
Jim: I'm now a cannibal.
Me: WAIT, JIM! N-
Three nuns went up to Mother Teresa and said, "Mother Teresa, we would not like to be nuns anymore." Mother Teresa said, "Okay, but first you have to do something unholy." So they leave and come back three days later. The first one says, "Mother Teresa, I did something unholy. I took a little kid's bike." Mother Teresa says, "Okay, drink from the holy water and you are free to go." The second nun walks up, upset, "I did something worse than her. I slept with a married man." The last nun walks up and says, "I did something worse than all of them." Mother Teresa says, "Oh god, oh gosh, what is it?" And the third nun says, "I peed in the holy water."
I like women how I like my hair dryer: locked in a closet most of the time and only being used to blow me dry.
Why can't a dinosaur clap? Because it's dead.
What is the butt’s favorite computer?
The Tushiba.
Someone kills an emotionally weak person by hard words and bullying.
No one will suspect the killer was anyone who took part.
Why did the child cross the road?
To get to the church.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The Priest... Let's go to my office, because I'm totally not a pedophile.
There was a woman. She is property. Ha, sucks for that dishwasher.
Why can’t Sally get a hair cut? She has cancer.
Want to hear a joke?
Ohio State football.
Paki curry is shit.
The pilot goes "We're going down!"
The other pilot yells "Down like your syndrome?"
Why did my wife leave me?
I wish I knew.
What do you get from childhood drama? A ginger with autism.
What’s the difference between bowling balls and babies?
You can unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.
"Muffin Man, Muffin Man, he's gonna rape you in his van."