Worst Jokes Ever
The only reason Stephen Hawking died is because he broke his charger.
What's Adam's biggest fear?
Andy with a belt.
What do you call a blonde?
A piss-head.
Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.
I forgot my lucky egg! It always gives me an eggcellent amount of luck!
My grandma always loved to craft clothing. She dyed last week.
What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error.
How did the air beat me at chess? It did that thing, haha!
What happened to the egg after it went on the rollercoaster?
It was scrambled.
Stephen Hawking couldn't take the stairway to Heaven, he had to take the lift.
Why did the bike fall over?
'Cause it was wheely tired.
How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!
What does one piece of toilet paper say to the other?
"I'm wiped!"
Hi, this is John's Pizzeria and abortion clinic. Your loss is our sauce!
I did have a good night's sleep and a good day today, and tomorrow I have [planned] for a good night's sleep, and sleep with my...
What's the difference between a fly and a bird?
A bird can fly, but a fly cannot bird.
What do you use to strap an eagle's nest together?
An eagle-lastic band!
What is the difference between a car and a tree?
A tree cannot drive, but a car can drive.
What does your girl do to me? She sucks me off.