Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

"Give me 5 cents and I’ll grant you a wish."

Ok.

"Thank you, what is your wish?"

I wish for my 5 cents back.

I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Heaven.

God had not built a ramp yet... or an escalator.

My pathological cheater of a sister wanted to play a board game with me.

I turned her down because I didn't like the Risk involved.

We asked our teacher many times for an atlas, and he said, "At last, you can have one!"

I picked up a document, and I started to feel cold.

I looked down at the document, and it read "DRAFT."

What do you call a group of letters that like to dance but make you want to poop?

A vowel movement.

They used to laugh when I said I wanted to be a comedian.

Well, they're not laughing now!

My grandfather was the type of person who never threw anything away.

He died in World War II holding on to a hand grenade.

Remember back in the day when your TV wouldn't work so you'd bang it a few times?

I tried that with my dishwasher, but unfortunately, she ended up pregnant...

A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis. Her mom said, "You should have asked me last night. It was at the tip of my tongue."

Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?

In case they get a hole in one!

What's the difference between Palestine and yo mama?

Yo mama can be found on Google maps.