Worst Jokes Ever
Why can’t Homer Simpson bring his family into Moe’s Tavern?
Because there’s a bartender in there.
Why are Christmas trees banned at the mental hospital?
They would hang themselves like ornaments.
What do Call of Duty and Al-Qaeda goals have in common?
You’ve got to get more than one down.
Kurt Cobain said he wished he was gay.
That's why he married Courtney Love.
What is a similarity between priests and doctors?
They both have fetishes for their professions.
I remember my first day back when working at a camp. I was so surprised when the trains arrived.
Why do high tides come up so high?
Because they come up to say hi.
How many Senators fans does it take to change a light bulb?
All 3 of them.
Hockey for life!
I diddled for a total of 67 times. I am the ultra Gooner. My cum is everywhere. I am the goon master.
Q. What's the difference between pizza and an emo?
A. The pizza doesn't cut itself.
Q. What do you call anal sex with a politician?
A. A backroom deal.
Did you hear about the guy who died by lethal injection and writhed on the stretcher for 20 minutes?
I guess it really IS all in the execution.
When a baby was born to a slave, did the slave owners hang a "Bred in Captivity" sign above the crib?
I have no problem with prostitution.
It's like an Air BnB for your dick.
Yo momma so slutty, she could use a tank truck as a dildo.
What do you call an emo kid at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.
How many children does Explain Bear have?
Explain Bear weighs 1 ton.
How many belly rolls does Explain Bear have?
Explain bear still lives in his mother's basement.