Worst Jokes Ever
Why were the rappers late for their flight?
They forgot to pack.
How do cats relieve themselves in front of people? By licking their puss.
Does a midget count as an orphan?
How do you get a monkey off the wall?
You jerk him off!
What's the natural cure to an old man's inability to forgive people?
Alzheimer's.
At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.
My father was a great pilot. He died on 9/11.
What war did the black community win?
The Obama era. Only to lose to a smarter white person.
Being unemployed is like watching our president fall over himself on the stairs.
There’s no hope.
How do you know if you’ve walked into a sex addicts' counselling session?
The psychologist will thank you for coming.
Imagine playing Subway Surfers in real life.
The creator's son tried that!
(My friends said to post this. I accept no responsibility.)
Do you know why dinosaurs can't eat hyenas?
Because they're dead! The last thing they ate was some rock.
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
A bowling ball doesn't cry when you put your fingers in it.
What do you get when you mix a grizzly bear and milk? Mauled.
Why can’t English people play chess? They ain't got no queen.
A Russian walked into a bar... Unlucky for him I guess, in Soviet Russia, you don’t walk into bars. Bars walk into you.
I was digging in my garden when I found this chest of gold coins.
I wanted to run inside to tell my wife what I found, but that's when I remembered why I was digging.
I hate it when you say your life is a joke because a joke actually has meaning.
I refuse to go bungee jumping. I was brought into this world from broken plastic, and I REFUSE to die the same way.
What’s one thing that an orphan can never get in poker?
A full house.