Worst Jokes Ever
Man: Why can't an orphan use Verizon?
Kid: I don't know why.
Man: Because they have a family plan.
Kid: Well, I need to get another phone service now.
Yo momma so fat, when she pulled out the chair, it screamed and broke itself.
Roses are red, Violets are blue.
Run, bestie, run!
What did the orphan do when he got punched?
Nothing, because his parents weren't there! :)
Your mom is so slow it took her 9 months to create a joke.
What do skeletons do with their organs?
They organize them!
This is not really a joke, but it's a question.
If life is a movie, then is death life? Is we seeing the trailer right now?
Do you know why boys can't ask girls out? Because they don't have any balls to ask girls out!
Why do orphans only have 354 days?
'Cause they are missing Mothers and Fathers day!
In kindergarten, we were starting to learn how to use "big kid words." On Monday, the teacher asked everyone to share what they did over the weekend, but we had to use big kid words.
Eventually it got to my turn, and the teacher asked me what I did over the summer. I told her I read a book. She asked me what book, and to remember to use "big kid words." I'll never forget the horrified look on her face when I replied with "Winnie the Shit."
I would invite you to play baseball, but there's no home for you to run to.
What did the blanket say when he fell off the bed?
Oh sheet!
Why can't an orphan be friends with Dom Toretto?
Dom doesn't have friends; he has "family."
Why would the chicken not cross the road?
Because it's too old. (The joke is old.) (The chicken is old.)
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Smell mop.
Smell mop who?
NASA stands for "Nobody asks scientists anymore."
What do Ligma and Bofa have in common?
They both ride on my dick.
Rat
What do you call a downy who can't get a girlfriend?
Down bad.