Worst Jokes Ever
I tried to catch fog yesterday...
Mist.
My reverse psychologist told me I didn't have it in me to make a recovery.
When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar!
3.14% of sailors are pirates.
Mr. Bunler.
What did the melon say to the avocado when he proposed?
Can't elope.
Why is helium so expensive? It is due to inflation.
What do you call Holly and Elenji?
A couple.
Yo mama is so ugly, she gave Michael Myers nightmares.
Wanna hear a joke?
Yeah.
...
What's the joke?
I said it already!
Looks like McSkillet McKilledIt.
Roses are red, I like weed,
If you say yes then I'll do a "good deed."
Walking's a chore, let alone crawling.
How does Skeletor feel after He-Man beats him up?
Skelesore.
What type of comedy can't Steven Hawking do?
Stand-up comedy.
What is Bill Gates’ favorite equation?
1 + 1 =
Girls: Boys are like games, they're meant to get played.
Boys: Girls are like stones, the flat ones get skipped.
When a clock goes forward, it goes "tic-tac," but when Rommel goes backwards, it's tactic.
Why is it that the Libertarian Party never had a formal president of the United States that ran as a Libertarian that had a presidential library?
Because the Libertarian Party is the party of principle. The Libertarian Party was founded in 1971 and the Libertarian Party has not won a presidential election since 1972, because the Libertarian Party doesn't believe in using force to achieve political and social goals.
What do you call a group of jumping Mexicans?
Border hoppers! LOL.