Worst Jokes Ever
What do a male pornstar and an emo have in common?
They are both hung.
What do you call a nun on a bike?
Virgin Mobile.
What do British politics and transgender people have in common?
Both aren't what they used to be...
What is a necrophiliac's safe word?
"I'm alive!"
What is George Floyd’s best pick up line?
"You're breathtaking."
My wife and I have decided that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You can't milk a cow for over 10 years.
I feel bad for the people who were born on April 1.
Their life is a joke.
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today?”
Person 2: “Seven.”
Person 1: “What the fuck, dude.”
Person 2: “I know, right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.”
(Based on an encounter I had recently)
What do you call a Chinese assassin?
Chinese takeout.
Why do gay men hate periods?
They prefer Collins.
What is the difference between me and Paul Walker?
I’ve watched Fast and Furious Seven.
The Twin Towers are like crippled legs; once they break, they can’t be fixed.
My first football game was a lot like my first time having sex.
I was bloody, sore, and but at least my dad came.
I believe Alia is a true god because they say in the beginning there was an explosion.
I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.
Why did the mummy leave his tomb after 3000 years?
Because he thought he was old enough to leave home.
That is one of the very, very, very, very, VERY WORST jokes ever.
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Frostbite.
Where is Rex the dinosaur? In the ground.
What is the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage!