Worst Jokes Ever
Which one of Lord Arthur's knights invented the round table?
Sir Cumference.
Why would hunting a bald eagle in America be a bad idea?
Because it's ill-eagle.
My friend had this annoying little kid that always used to yell and scream when he didn't get what he wanted. I told my friend there's a new attraction a few states away he could take him to.
Confused, my friend asked me what it was. I told him, "The Sandy Hook Experience: Where you come in and leave with a 'hole' lot of fun."
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.
What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.
Don’t have phone sex without protection, you might get hearing aids!
What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.
gae
The Columbine High School basketball team hasn't been the same since they lost their two best shooters.
What’s black, white, and red all over?
An ethnic orgy.
A mushroom walked into a pub.
He asked the bartender to give him a beer.
The bartender said, "I can't, you'll get too rowdy."
The mushroom then said, "Oh come on! When I drink, I'm a fun guy!"
Q: What do American beer and canoes have in common?
A: Fu@king close to water!
Why did Annie fall from the swing?
Because she had no hands.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Annie.
Girls Are Yummy Stupid
Are Really Erectable
Tasty Honey Ejaculable
Booty Everything Sucking Titties
Gays don't be mad, read the first letter of every word :D
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's logo!
What's fast and almost got away?
A Mexican jumping the border.
How many times does 47 fit into 9?
Get in the van and find out.
This guy is boiling water. The girl walks in and says, “What are you doing?” The guy says, “I’m making Holy Water.” She said, “How?” He said, “I’m boiling the hell out of it.”
Why did the crumb cake isolate himself? He had a crumbling social life.
I was up all night because my neighbors were having sex.
*I was actually up all night watching.*