Worst Jokes Ever
Don't use Head and Shoulders, just use Head; otherwise, you'll end up in the retarded situation Stephen Hawking went through.
Why did the baby cross the road?
Because it was stapled to the chicken.
Why is James depressed?........ because he's a bitch.
The reason Stephen sounds like a computer is because he ate his USB.
Why is the Champs d'Elysees in Paris lined with trees?
Because German soldiers like marching in the shade!
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They'll just arrest the bulb for being broke and beat the room for being dark.
Kid: Why do orphans like tennis?
Dad: Because it's the only time they get "love."
How do you get a baby into a small bowl?
A blender.
How do you get it out? Tostito chips.
What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative? Nothing, they both make you cry when you look at it.
I don't get why people don't like my abortion jokes. Do they have a stick up their ass? Wait, that's the other hole.
What’s the difference between prison and concentration camps?
At least you don’t die when you shower.
Six out of seven dwarfs aren’t Happy.
What is the opposite of Progress?
Congress.
What do classical musicians do when they die?
They decompose.
What do you call an otter video game that is about robbing?-
Grand Theft Otter!
What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it’s the "R," but it’s actually the "C".
Why did the fridge have lots of friends?
Cause it was COOL.
Only a genius can say this.
I am stupid.
My friend got a sorry excuse for a new hair style, she says "How do you like my new hair style?"
Me: I think it's a great idea, when are you getting one?
Do you need an ark?
Because I Noah guy!