Worst Jokes Ever
If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber.
Yo mama was so fat, Huggy Wuggy couldn't fit his arms around her!
If per capita is an issue, decapita can be arranged.
Why can't orphans become criminals? Because she isn't wanted.
Where does Hitler look first when he loses something? The attic.
A guy goes ice fishing for the very first time. All of a sudden, he hears a voice. “There are no fish under the ice!”
He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. Again, he hears the booming voice: “There are no fish under the ice!”
He nervously looks up and asks, “Lord? Is that you?”
“No, this is the rink manager!”
Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.
We need to stop making jokes about orphans. They will tell their parents. Oh wait...
What do dark humor and kids with cancer have in common? They never get old.
Papyrus: Well come to the underground.
Sans: How was your falls?
Papyrus: G-g-good luck eve-ever ge-getting o-out.
Sans: Give me your balls!
What is the opposite of Progress?
Congress.
If raping someone is sexual harassment, then is raping a rapist inverted harassment?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find their home base.
You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours.
Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
People on the Titanic were cracking up at my jokes, so did the Titanic. No, really, the Titanic cracked in half!
What do classical musicians do when they die?
They decompose.
What's the difference between an apple and a black man?
Apples look better hanging on a tree.
You have an entire life being an idiot, why not take a day off?
The depressed kid tried to high five the tree.
But the tree left him hanging!