Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the little girl's ice cream melt?
She was on fire.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They ain’t got no home to run to.
Why can’t England people play chess? They ain’t got no queen.
Can you drive a pizza? Of course, as long as you change the olive oil.
Aren't paraplegics just plegics that can fly?
When an asteroid is coming to kill us all:
98.9% of the population: OMG, we're all gonna die!
1% of the population: Eh... I never had any friends anyway.
Alia: ROLL THE INTRO!
There was a magician on board the Titanic and said that he could make anything disappear.
Once the ship had gone down one of the passengers said to him, "Go on, so what did you do with the ship then?"
What do Michael Jackson and Pinocchio have in common?
They both lie over little boys 😂
How do you blindfold an Asian? String!
Why did Michael Jackson decide to sell the ranch?
Because it was over 10 years old.
What do priests and doctors have in common?
They both do physicals on kids.
Did you hear they think Michael Jackson died from food poisoning? He ate 12-year-old nuts and a 13-year-old wiener.
What did the priest say to the skunk?
Let us spray.
What do you call a letter using the bathroom?
The P.
Why was the man running around his bed?
Because he needed to catch up on his sleep!
When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.
Your birth certificate is a complaint to the condom factory.
I don't say funny stuff because I'm afraid they will take the German passport from me.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell them to clap til' their parents get home.
Why did the orphans like church so much?
So they had someone to call father...
What do Ellen DeGeneres and homeless people have in common?
They don’t cook because they love eating out.