Worst Jokes Ever

What is a pig crossed with a pineapple?

A porkypine!

Two blondes fell in a hole and one asked, "It's dark in here, isn't it?" and the other one says, "I don't know, I can't see."

What's the difference between $1 million and baby teeth?

I don't have $1 million in my wallet.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's a silly question. Feminists can't change anything.

Why were the Twin Towers upset? They ordered Domino's but got jets.

Kenny's favorite part of living in his mom's basement is sleeping with the landlady.

Bully: I'm going to hurt you so bad.

You: Well... your IQ is the same amount of teeth I'm about to knock out, so... you're so dumb that you can't even do that.

And your IQ is 5.

Kobe ended so many games with threes. Now he ends his life with trees.

Friend 1: What's your favorite drink or food?

Friend 2: Pizza.

Friend 3: Donuts.

Friend 4: I don't eat food but I do drink bleach.

Friend 1: (calling the suicide hotline)

Friend 2: (Calling the parents)

A lady weightlifter goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, I have a confession." The doctor asks, "What is that?" She replies, "I've been using steroids and....I think I've grown a penis." The doctor looks at her and asks, "Anabolic?" There's an awkward silence then she replies, "No, just a penis."

Where did Janet go during the bombing? Everywhere.

You're probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time.

What's a skeleton's favorite food?

Spare ribs.

I'm a big fan of white boards. I find them... Remarkable.

A man walks into a bar with a slab of concrete under his arm and says, "A beer please! and one for the road!"

I didn't like having long nails, but they're growing on me.

What kind of fish comes out at night?

A starfish.

What's the best thing about a blowjob?

- The silence.

Roses are red. The sun isn't shining. My mental state is rapidly declining.

I was both shocked and amazed to hear Stephen Hawking kicked the bucket.