Worst Jokes Ever
Whenever I have a one night stand, I always use protection.
A fake name and a fake phone number.
What is it called when you hit your funny bone at night?
Dark humor.
What do you get when you combine a priest and lawyer? A Father-in-law.
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company.
Dead people jokes are the best, they're ground breaking.
When you ask your sister if she wanna smash, but then she grabs the Switch.
My uncle said he wants to be a dinosaur. I said why... he said so I could be extinct 😭😭
What music do Astronauts listen to?
Nep-tunes.
A man walks into a bar, sits down, and asks the bartender for 12 shots of vodka. The bartender asks what the man is celebrating, and said he'll give one shot on the house. The man said, "I'm celebrating my first blowjob. And nah, if 12 shots doesn't get the taste out of my mouth, nothing will."
To all of you who can't understand using jokes as a coping mechanism... you know what I will ask of you :)
I remember the first time I went to one of Luis Fonsi's concerts...
I wanted to commit DEATHpacito so badly.
If Stephen Hawking has a heart attack, do you take him to Halfords or A&E?
This is really mean...
A man put a blind man in a circular room and said, "Your dinner's in the corner."
The reason why the "eating a tide pod" trend ended so fast is because everyone that did it died.
I went to a park, then I kicked a ball at a kid in a wheelchair, then screamed "Rocket League!"
When was the first Black Friday?
1619.
Why did Mia Khalifa become so famous?
Because she blew up.
Where did Lucy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
Osama Spin Laden, dropping beats like the twin towers.
What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? -- Shear madness.