Worst Jokes Ever
Do you want to know how to make a Smurf? CHOKE A MIDGET!
Kid: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Kid: But, mom, I'm blind!
Mom: Exactly.
Why do vegetarians give anonymous blowjobs at the glory hole at an adult book store? Because they don't want anybody to find out that they like meat.
What is the difference between a woman performing anilingus on a man and a woman performing fellatio on a man?
If a woman is performing anilingus on a man, it is not classified as heterosexual sodomy, you fucking idiot!!!!
What is a glory hole at the adult book store used for?
Campaign contributions to the Republican Party.
Three drunk men get in a taxi. The driver knew they were drunk, so he started the car and turned it off. The first man gave him the money. The second man thanked him, but the third man slapped the driver. The driver, surprised that he noticed, asked why, and the third man replied with, "Why did you drive so fast?"
I should be ashamed of myself for making all these jokes at the expense of the disabled! After all, they can't even stand up for themselves.
What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?
I feel like a kid again.
What's a lesbian's favorite sport? Dodgeball.
I know five fat people, and you're three of them.
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? -- "Bison."
A man asks a woman, "Are you a school?"
The woman replies, "No, why?"
The man says, "Oh, I wanted to shoot my kid inside of you."
Why did the tomato blush? -- Because it saw the salad dressing.
Better to cum in the sink... than to sink in the cum.
Me: Hey, do you want to see my grandma?
Friend: Yeah, sure.
Me: *pulls out gun*
Yo mama so stupid she threw a Mother's Day party at an orphanage.
They say masturbation is better with a dead arm. Apparently, I ruined that funeral.
What do you call a cute door?
Adoorable.
If trees could kill you, they wood.
Russian history in 5 words: "And then things got worse."