Worst Jokes Ever
What's the best part about a dead prostitute?
The second hour is free.
The good thing about dead baby jokes is that they never get old.
My kids are so ungrateful. I got them a new dishwasher and they just won't stop complaining about their mom.
Yo mama so stupid she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company.
What does Madeleine McCann and my old Xbox have in common?
They both died with red rings.
What's the second to last letter in the alphabet? Y. Cause I wanted to know.
Tombstone engraving: "I TOLD you I was sick!"
Me walking in to the office:
Principal: Tell me, what did you do?
Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was an end portal...
Is Google a girl or a boy?
Obviously a girl, because it won't let you finish a sentence without making a suggestion.
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. "1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."
A boy breaks a vase, and his mom says it's ok, honey, mistakes happen. How do you think you were born?
Your mama so stupid, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.
I've just started reading my first ever Braille horror story, and I think that something scary is about to happen. I can feel it.
Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign?
A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!
What do you call a knight in a cannibal village? -- Canned food.
Q: Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
A: To find Pooh!
Cousins make dozens.
Doctor: What makes you feel depressed?
Me: Seeing others happy.
Doctor: Ok, so what makes you happy?
Me: Seeing stupid people in misery or agony.
Doctor: Well, that's rather sadistic.
Me: Well, statistically one in two doctors have fingered a child...
Doctor: Do you want your prescription or shall I book you an endoscopy?
Me: There's nothing hidden inside me, I'm empty "smug face".
What type of meat do priests eat on Good Friday? Nun.
Decisions taken by world leaders often have great significance during a crisis.
The Americans, in particular, are suffering many losses during the current global pandemic. Remember, in the 1980's they had Ronald Reagan, Johnny Cash, and Bob Hope.
In 2020 they have Donald Trump, no Cash, and no Hope!