Worst Jokes Ever

Q. How many babies does it take to shingle a roof?

A. Depends how thin you slice them.

What happens when a cow jumps over a wire fence?

Udder destruction.

How do you circumcise a hillbilly? ... Kick his sister in the jaw.

Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.

Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? Because he can't do stand-up.

Did you hear about the homosexual letter? It only came in male boxes.

What do you call a Mexican Baptism?

Bean Dip.

Yo mama so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke marijuana. Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked if she wanna. Jill said yes and pulled up her dress, and they had a little fun. Stupid Jill forgot the pill, now they have a son.

Why does a heterosexual man swallow the sperm of another man after he has given him a brojob?

Because of the cream filling inside, just like the individually wrapped cakes of Hostess Twinkies.

Don't let an extra chromosome get you down.

I have a fish that can breakdance!

Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.

I like my women like I like my coffee.

Dark, rich, and imported.

Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?

A: It's cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're pretty much screwed.

How is spinach like anal sex?

If you were forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.

I still remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. He said, “Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

According to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.

I called the suicide hotline in Saudi Arabia. They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

Christopher's Mom said, "One man's trash is another man's treasure."

Turns out Christopher was adopted.

Why are women like KFC?

After you've finished with the thigh and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.