Worst Jokes Ever

After an explosion at a French cheese factory... all that was left was De Brie.

Rules of Dark humor:

1. All subject matter can be used, nothing is off limits.

2. No saying "Me" or "My Life" as a joke. Nobody finds those funny. We want actual good and meaningful jokes.

3. Don't Repeat Previously Posted Jokes. If you are saying the same joke that the person right before you posted you are just begging for attention and nobody by any means likes that.

I will add more in the future and be frequent on this site.

- Sincerely, Zane

I told my friend yesterday he's literally my dad.

He didn't show up for the rest of the year.

Ever since I needed a wheelchair, my husband has been so rude. He’s been pushing me around and talking behind my back.

My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help me understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So, me with my horrible humor, decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around, and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are, a fine African meal." Then everybody looked at me in disappointment, and then I continued to say, "What? Poor taste?"

Yo, forehead is so big...the photo on yo driver's license says "to be continued on the back."

What can you say to make a rape victim feel better?

"It will be over soon."

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?

Yo mama so fat, she got baptized at SeaWorld.

It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.

A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. It's a Shitzu.

So I had a friend who was an orphan, and he said, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, just reminding you." I then said, "Hey, how's your parents?" I never saw him after that.

I was asked at school to draw a line across the paper, but instead I showed them my wrists.

You call it suicide. I call it a failed parkour attempt.

Helen Keller walked into a bar, and a table, and chairs.

Yo mama so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued."

What do you call a depressed emo? Dead.

So I was sitting on the couch with a woman, and I asked her, "Does this napkin smell like chloroform?"

How 9/11 Happened!:

Hey Bush, Truth or dare?

The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar.

It was tense.