Worst Jokes Ever
Why do French people eat snails?
Because they don’t like fast food.
What do orphans, parents, and trees have in common? They leafed.
I was going to tell my dad a joke, but he still hasn't come back with the milk yet.
What's a ninja's favorite type of shoes?
Sneakers.
What do you call an apple that fell out of the tree?
An orphan.
A man wakes from a coma. His wife changes out of her black clothes and, irritated, remarks, “I really cannot depend on you in anything, can I!”
What's an orphan's favorite movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
Son: “Dad, did you get the results of the DNA test back?”
Dad: “Call me George.”
Where does the orphan go when he's done with school? To the cemetery.
A fine is a tax for doing something wrong. A tax is a fine for doing something good.
What’s something you might say at sea, but not at your partner?
Land ho!
Why is there air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
Ever tried African food?
Neither have they.
How do you punish blind kids?
Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.
When you forget the pinata at the birthday party. The kids: "Aww man." But the emo kid just hung himself. Kids: "Yaaaaayyy." Parents: "Adjust, improvise, overcome, that is the way."
My dad is so good at instruments, he said he loves to finger "a minor."
What did the orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get into the Batmobile, Robin."
What's the Twin Towers' favorite Minecraft biome?
A plains biome.
One dark stormy night when I was 8 years old, I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee. Half asleep, I walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door, I felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically, and the ghostly sound stopped. Terrified, I did what I had to and went back to bed.
The next 3 nights, the same thing happened, and finally, I decided I had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up, I went into my parents' room and woke my mom up and said, "You have to come with me and see this, it's really important." Half asleep, she murmured, "Oh, what is it? Can't it wait until the morning?" I pleaded, "No, you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost. When I go in the middle of the night, I can hear a ghost sound. Then when I open the door, I feel the cold as it swoops through me, and the light comes on automatically." She yawned and said, "Oh, so that's who's been peeing in the refrigerator."
I was tickling my step brother's balls, and then it hit me: why is he laughing?