Worst Jokes Ever
My Grandpa killed 30 Air Force pilots in WW2. He was a very bad mechanic.
What do you call a flooded hospital?
Vegetable soup.
Once I was in South Korea doing stand up comedy... and I started with a "hidden" joke and I said: "I'm so happy to be here in one of the most beautiful Korea's in the world..." which is a good joke but they didn't get it, and they looked at me badly... so I said "I'm here in the South which is more beautiful... South good, North booooooo." But still nothing, they kept glaring at me... then I realized that maybe I was in the wrong Korea.
"Now buzz off" - Explain Bear
9/11 was a round of Clash of Clans; they knocked down 2 towers, not 3.
Why is America so bad at Clash of Clans? Because we already lost two towers.
"That driving backwards, it creeping me out, you're gonna wreck or something." - Lightning McQueen.
Because that is what could have saved Titanic, and it wrecked.
Why can't Asians do word searches?
They can't see the words.
Bastards can never pray, because they don't have a Holy Father.
Why didn’t the grape 🍇 leave her family?
Because she loved raisin' kids!
What goes up but doesn't come down?
Why did the doctor tell the man to go for a mountain walk?
Alps clear the mind! Haha.
"Ben 10" games on Roblox: 💀💀💀
I met a talking lizard. The doctor told me he had ereptile dysfunction! 🦎
My uncle died in 9/11. He was a pilot.
Why did the kidnapper cross the road?
To get the kids at the playground.
There were two friends talking one day. Tim tells John, "I think I'm gay."
John says to Tim, "What do you mean?"
Tim says, "When I grow up, I want to dress like a woman and sing karaoke in a bar and call myself (Gillette the best a man can get)!"
John says to Tim, "I think you're right, and thanks for reminding me I need to buy razors."
This morning, I was having a conversation with my ex-boyfriend about reincarnation. I said to him, "If you could come back in the next life as anything, what would you come back as?" He thought about it for a minute and says, "A tree. That way, everybody can look at me and admire me."
Then he says the same thing to me. I started thinking about it when these two sexy, half-naked studs walked by. One was a jock, the other on his bicycle. I know I said I want to come back as a jockstrap or a bicycle seat, but knowing my luck, I'll come back as a tampon.
What is the difference between the Leaning Tower of Pisa and the Twin Towers? The Tower of Pisa is more flexible.
The reason why in the US their emergency number is 911 is because of my uncle Mohamed, RIP, best pilot ever.