Worst Jokes Ever
How many gay guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just one... But it takes the entire emergency room to take it out.
I recently learned that it's politically incorrect to talk about taking part in a school shooting.
Apparently the term "school photos" is more acceptable.
A man wakes from a coma. His wife changes out of her black clothes and, irritated, remarks, “I really cannot depend on you in anything, can I!”
What's a ninja's favorite type of shoes?
Sneakers.
What do you call an apple that fell out of the tree?
An orphan.
What did the orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get into the Batmobile, Robin."
Where does the orphan go when he's done with school? To the cemetery.
I was going to tell my dad a joke, but he still hasn't come back with the milk yet.
My dad is so good at instruments, he said he loves to finger "a minor."
Congrats to George Floyd on 2 years sobriety.
I was tickling my step brother's balls, and then it hit me: why is he laughing?
Why are orphans bad at poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is!
What do orphans, parents, and trees have in common? They leafed.
What's the Twin Towers' favorite Minecraft biome?
A plains biome.
Welcome to the roadkill cafe, where yesterday's crash is today's cash.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
One dark stormy night when I was 8 years old, I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee. Half asleep, I walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. When I opened the door, I felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically, and the ghostly sound stopped. Terrified, I did what I had to and went back to bed.
The next 3 nights, the same thing happened, and finally, I decided I had to tell my mom no matter how hard to believe it sounded. The next night I woke up, I went into my parents' room and woke my mom up and said, "You have to come with me and see this, it's really important." Half asleep, she murmured, "Oh, what is it? Can't it wait until the morning?" I pleaded, "No, you have to come see, our bathroom is haunted by a ghost. When I go in the middle of the night, I can hear a ghost sound. Then when I open the door, I feel the cold as it swoops through me, and the light comes on automatically." She yawned and said, "Oh, so that's who's been peeing in the refrigerator."
I tried being an emo, but I never got the hang of it.
When I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got all excited and asked if I could fly a plane.
Everyone has cracks in them, mine's just in my heart and not my ass.