Worst Jokes Ever
How does a cannibal start a wedding reception?
He toasts the groom.
Yo mama's so dumb, when a robber stole her TV, she said, "You forgot the remote!"
When my son was little, he loved to draw. Although he would always rip up the paper whenever there was one little slip up. Too bad he became a tattoo artist.....
I can explain Superman and Batman movies in one sentence.
Two orphans fighting in the rain.
When the orphan got a job as a priest, what was his name?
Father Les.
What did the clock do when it was hungry? It went back four seconds.
What are Michael Jackson’s pronouns? He/heeeeeee.
Why are orphans bad at poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is!
I tried being an emo, but I never got the hang of it.
Why is prostitution illegal?
Because when it comes to screwing people and taking their money, the government doesn't want anyone outperforming them.
How much semen can a gay man hold? A buttload.
You have a six-minute timer to live, but when you breathe, it resets.
Why do orphans love having sex?
Because they can finally call somebody "daddy."
Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed.
Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.
When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."
What is red and goes 200 miles per hour?
A baby in a blender.
I don't like 9/11 jokes, they tend to crash and burn.
Name an ant which is very heavy?
Eleph-ant.
What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!
At baseball practice...
"Hey John, did you bring the bucket of balls?"
"No, but I got two right here."