Worst Jokes Ever
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well, it depends on how hard you throw them.
Did you hear of the guy who was sad about being in a wheelchair? He had that crippling depression.
What do magicians and prostitutes have in common?
Answer: disappearing acts.
What do squirrels and men have in common?
They always want a nut.
What do you call an autistic person with a driver's license?
A LETHAL WEAPON!
What’s loud, red and goes at 200mph?
Paul Walker’s Porsche.
Hey, did you know that 9/11 won a Grammy?
Yes, best comedy award.
I like my wine like how I like my women: 10 years old and locked in a basement.
What do you do if you see someone raping your girlfriend? Help out. There is no way she can fight both of you. Then, find the poor man a lawyer.
My ex was an orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn't want her, why would I?
Your hairline's so bent, it goes west, east, north, and south!
A girl named Sally has no arms.
"KNOCK KNOCK"
She never answered...
What do ghosts put on their bagels 🥯?
Scream cheese.
I'm sweating like Michael Jackson at a kindergarten.
What do you call a cup with a handle?
A mug! HAHA ha... My parents just got a divorce :(
I'm a rapist.
I heard that to slow the growth of fire, you use a flame retardant.
So I threw my stupid son in the flames when my house caught on fire!
Today I feel diving. Today I feel penalty. Today I feel tap in. Today I feel ghosting. Today I feel finished. Today I feel a bench warmer... I know what it feels to be discriminated... I was bullied because I am Pristiano Penaldo.
Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor?
Because it can't hit home.
Comebacks when someone say: Bully: "Your teeth is so yellow that when you start smiling you slow down the traffic." Say: "At least its brighter than your future."