Worst Jokes Ever
What does a priest and a wristwatch have in common? They both start at 12.
My friends: Ugh, why are you so lazy and no fun?
My parents: Why can't you be like your siblings?
My teacher: I don't care if you're depressed, focus on your study!
The songs: We understand you :)
Titanic was sinking.
Passenger: "How far are we from land?"
Captain: "Two miles."
Passenger: "Which direction?"
Captain: "Down."
I like my humor like my people. Well done.
How do emos compliment each other?
They say, "I like your cuts g."
A blind comedian was asked to do stand up for a hospital. No one laughed at his jokes, so he continued to sing, "If you're happy and you know it..."
The room was full of arm amputees.
Did you hear about the bisexual from Alabama? He can't decide whether to fuck his brother or his sister.
What's long, black and full of seamen? A submarine.
I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they eat the bat.
I went on a walk last night with a really hot girl. Then she noticed me, and we went for a run.
How does Moses prepare his tea? -- Hebrews it.
What is the richest planet?
Saturn 🪐- It has many rings.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.
Nine months later, they happily had some use for their baby carriage.
Two years later, they went up again, then their daughter had a brother.
But one little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother.
My town's population never changes. Every time a girl gets pregnant, a guy leaves town.
The twin towers were like my parents... They never came back.
What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?
One's got hope in her soul, the other's got soap in her hole.
How does a crazy person get to the woods?
He takes the psychopath.
Why did Michael Jackson rush to Walmart?
He heard boys' pants were half off!
How did the Germans conquer Poland so fast? They marched in backwards and the Polish people thought they were leaving.