Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
... family photo.
Why do the orphans love going to the bakery down the street so much? Because their cookies are homemade.
How do you keep a blind kid busy? Give him sandpaper and tell him it's a find-a-word. 😂🤣
What time is it when you get home, can you walk home and walk?
Can I put deez nuts in yo cluts?
What does a depressed person and a jacket have in common?
They’re both hanging in the closet.
Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating 12-year-old nuts.
What's the difference between the righteous and a sinner?
You decide.
Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"
Kid: "A leopard."
Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."
Kid: "Broooooooooooo."
Pain. Gained. Anxiety. Fulfilled. Insomnia. Depression. Always with me. Happiness... The one thing I can't have.
My friend said, "Why do you have depression? There is so much happiness in the world." And I said, "Why do you have asthma? There is so much air in the world."
Where would an astronaut park his spaceship? A parking meteor.
You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.
So, I took a poop outside. When I was done, I wiped and got it on my finger. After that, I had Nutella, and I thought the poop on my hand was Nutella, and I licked it. I said, "Daddy chill, what in the heck is this crap?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
What do you call a person who cares for chickens?
A chicken tender.
What's the difference between me and a rope?
The rope doesn't hang from itself.
🎆 New Year's Eve
Lil Johnny👦: "Every year the same, people always have to start banging before midnight!"
Mom👱🏻♀️: "Johnny, would you please leave the bedroom now?"
Dad👨🏻🦰: "Son, if you don't leave, it'll bang on your head!"
How are peppers 🌶 so nosey?
They get jalapeño business.
Did you know that new Teslas don't come with the new car smell?
They come with an Elon Musk.
The people in the Democratic Party are how I like my coffee.
Black and bitter.