Worst Jokes Ever

Yo mama is SO FAT... SO FUCKING FAT... That when she went on the bus, she wasn't allowed in. She asked why, and the driver pointed to the sign "Weight capacity of 50 people". The bus was empty.

She got mad and ate the bus!

Why do orphans play GTA?

So they can get wanted.

Why do orphans like boomerangs?

Because then they can play catch.

What do call six gay men going in a war?

Rainbow Six Siege.

Orphans are human too! They have parents like all of us, so I don't know why they're saying it's fun to make fun of an orphan. Have you ever been too cold and wondered if your parents are going to have another child and not you? That's not funny! It is %9000,000 NO!!!!!!!!!!

If you punch an orphan, they can't do anything; they can't tell their parents.

Why do people in wheelchairs get bullied?

'Cause they can’t stand up for themselves.

I took a sip of water.

Husband: I look fat, can someone compliment me?

Wife: You have good eyesight.

This isn't a joke, I repeat, this is not a joke. The plane in Lake Harriet is not in the lake. It is invisible because of the satellite pic, so there's no plane in Lake Harriet.

You’re so short, you could use a pillow as your bed and still have some wiggle room.

MAGAnon STOP SCAMING FOR THE SAKE OF LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do you put a baby in the microwave covered or uncovered?

Covered, it can take weeks to clean up the explosion.

So, on one partly cloudy night, there was a boy and his dad gazing up at the sky.

Dad: Aren't the stars just wonderful?

Boy: I'm not sure, from my angle, all I see are clouds.

Dad: Well, come over here and take a look.

Boy: Damn, the clouds always move when I get to the right spot!

Dad: Well then, I guess I will have to make you see them everywhere you look then.

Then the Dad shook and spun the boy around till he said...

NOW I'M SEEING STARS!!!

So I went to the bank and a lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her over.

Who's the smallest wife??

Micro-wife.

What do squats eat? Numbers.

What goes up but never comes down?

Water in Australia.

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

More than five because my basement is still dark.

What do you get when you cross an atheist an insomniac?

Someone who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog.