Worst Jokes Ever

You don't need a parachute to go skydiving, just to go skydiving twice.

The north tower wanted some salted fries at Burger King.

They were plane as usual.

What do you call a cute door?

Yo mama is so fat that when she fell over, she created the Grand Canyon.

"Why couldn’t the DJ keep any of the fish he caught?

He kept dropping the bass."

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because she wanted to have an affair with the rooster.

Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.

Why shouldn't orphans get a phone?

They would get stuck in an app because they can't find the home button.

I saw a man. I saw another man. And I saw another. Where am I? Comment below.

You know what’s traumatizing?

Your mom breastfeeding in front of you.

Help!

You ever notice that the USA could be a part of Russia?

RUSSIA US A

You are like a software update. Whenever I see you, I immediately think, "Not now."

What's the worst possible thing to be playing during the funeral of a bridge-collapse victim?

Fall Guys.

Why did the straight white caucasian male cross the road?

Because a black person was approaching.

A man asks God, "Hello God, why did you make my wife so dumb?"

God replies, "So she would love you..."

How can you tell if your husband is dead?

The sex is the same, but you get to use the remote.

Why do teenage girls hang out in odd-numbered groups?

Because they can't even.

Job interview: "What's your greatest weakness?"

"Honesty."

"I don't think honesty is a weakness."

"I don't give a fuck what you think."

What has 2 or 3 hands and is always right twice a day when it is broken?

A clock.

LEO is the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard.