Three people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from, but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: "Local calls are free."
They Jokes
Why does an orphan go to church? So they can call someone father and be loved.
I think Paul Walker and 9/11 jokes are great, but when I tell them to others, they tend to crash and burn.
Orphan: "Why can’t I watch a PG movie?"
Me: "They are Parental Guidance."
Brian has a crush on a cute girl, Sally, from school, so he goes and tells his dad about her, and he says, "Sorry, son, you can't like her; she is your sister." So Brian is okay with it, and he starts to like another girl, Madison, and he goes up to his dad and says, "I have a crush on this girl, Madison," and again the dad goes, "Oh, sorry, son, you can't like any girl in school; they are all your sisters." So he goes crying to his mom and says, "Dad said I can't like any girl because they are all my sisters," and the mom goes, "Oh, it's okay; you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad."
How did the rich save the poor?
They didn't let them in the Titanic.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna." Jack undressed, and she pulled up her dress so they could have some fun. But stupid Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
What does Kim Kardashian and the ocean have in common?
They both have plastic in them.
I hate it when disabled people get bullied...
... because they can't stand up for themselves.
Skeletons can't play church music, obviously. They got no organs.
What do a prostitute and peanut butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
Why do orphans play GTA? Because they want to feel wanted.
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
If only they had more mosquito nets in Africa, we could prevent millions of mosquitos dying needlessly of AIDS...
What's the problem with 9/11 jokes?
They are just two plane.
Why is North Korea so good at Geometry?
Because they have a supreme ruler.
Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said, "it's a deer." The other said, "No it's a coyote." The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.
Like this if you laughed.
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)
Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!
Why don't North Koreans like jazz music?
Because they don't have soul.
I walked into a room full of men masturbating. They all looked shocked when I didn't stop.
