They jokes
I'm what they call a ✨️askhole✨️.
A person who will consistently ask for your advice and wisdom, but then proceed to do the exact opposite of what you say.
They say the only curves Daveon likes are on his credit card statements.
Why don't rappers ever get lost?
Because they always follow the street signs.
Why did the short person bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
Japan takes credit for creating the rice cooker, but they forgot the USA made the largest one in 1945 and sent it to Japan.
Why do cheetahs run? Because they are spotty.
When I was feeling suicidal, I called the suicide hotline and they left me hanging.
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they have no Father's or Mother's days.
Q: What do nuns and bathrooms have in common?
A: They both have glory holes for pleasing.
How do pigs kill themselves?
They commit Kermit-cide.
What's the similarity between a pepperoni pizza and Freddy Krueger?
They both have red circles on their bodies.
What do you call crabs that do not share their food?
They are shellfish! (ノ≧∀≦)ノ
Why do orphans hate baseball?
They don’t know what home base is.
Yo mama so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a bowl!
Q: Why do I always see gays in the roundabout?
A: They couldn’t go straight.
Yo mama so thick, they need an aircraft carrier to take her places.
Texter 1: You know People treat me like a god.
Texter 2: How?
Texter 1: They ignore my existence unless they need something.
Why can't Americans play chess?
Because they already lost two towers.
One reason I like to tell riddles is because they help with critical thinking skills.
What will happen if orphans use an iPhone?
They can't find the home button.