They jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
What do you do when you're bored?
I beat up orphans.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Tip for Kindness for the day.
Tip one. Always speak up for yourself.
Yes, letting someone else speak up for you is nice but also speak up for yourself, be brave if a mean bully comes along. Speak up for yourself and others if they need it. Best, Gwen
I used to think that Jewish people were a myth.
But one day I realized, they Israel.
Why can you bully orphans?
What are they gonna do, go tell their parents?
What do Miss Reeves and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both have a touchy feeling for kids.
Why were the Twin Towers annoyed?
Because they ordered pepperoni pizzas, but all they got was plain.
Why do they call priests "father?" Because it's too suspicious to call him "daddy!"
America saying they are more stupid. Russia saying they are more stupid = the stupidest war.
Why can’t orphans win trophies?
Because they can’t take them home.
What's the difference between a drill and a priest?
Nothing, they both like screwing stuff!
What do a gay man and a tumbleweed have in common?
They blow and blow until they wind up on a fence in Wyoming.
Teacher, there are 3 birds. 1 gets shot. How many are left?
Student, none. They flew off because the shot scared them off.
Teacher, actually 2, but I like the way you think.
5 minutes later
Student, there are 3 women eating ice cream. 1 is licking it, 1 is drinking it melted, and 1 is sucking it. Which one is married?
Teacher, the one sucking it?
Student, no, the one with the ring, but I like the way you think.
A man dies and goes to Heaven. He sees a bunch of clocks and asks Jesus what they are for. He replied they are gauges, and that they move when people lie. He said that Mother Teresa's has moved twice, Abraham Lincoln's once, and George Washington's never.
The man asks to see the current president's, and Jesus just laughs and says that Joe Biden's is the one keeping the hurricanes to speed.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes into a bank, they turn off the cameras.
So in class, they were learning about where food comes from:
Teacher: So kids, where does bacon come from?
Student: PIGS!
Teacher: Correct. Where does mutton come from?
Student: SHEEP!
Teacher: And finally, here’s your homework.
Student: IK where that comes from!
A FAT COW! 😂😂
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
They wanted somebody to call "daddy."
When in Poland people go to a house party, and the atmosphere is bad, nobody is talking, they say: "Is there a German here?"
If I saw a homosexual or transsexual man do so much as TOUCH my child, he would be dead, zombified, and castrated by the end of the day.
Protect your young'uns from these degenerate freaks and live off the grid so they have no bearing on your life.
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.