They jokes
I think my coworkers are gay. -- Every time I walk by, they mumble, "What an ass."
I walked into a room full of men masturbating. They all looked shocked when I didn't stop.
How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? -- One. They are efficient and don't have humor.
Why do women have cleaner minds than men? Because they change theirs more often.
What do prime numbers and stoners have in common? The higher they are, the more spaced out they get.
There was a blackout in my neighborhood last night. The police told us to stay inside until they shot him.
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
What does a turtle and a pedophile have in common? They both want to get there before the hare does.
Three men are on a boat. They have four cigarettes, but nothing to light them with. So, they throw a cigarette overboard and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.
My wife left me for an Indian guy. I know he's going to treat her well, I heard they worship cows.
Why is the lesbian lifestyle so expensive? -- They're always eating out. ... and they buy Rolexes for their neighbors, because they wanna watch.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes into a bank, they turn off the cameras.
A programmer and his wife.
She says, "We're out of bread. Please go to the grocery store and buy one. And if they've got eggs, get six."
After a while, he's back with six loaves of bread.
The wife asks, "Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?"
He replies, "They had eggs."
Why do the French eat snails?
They don't like fast food.
What do women, tornadoes, and hurricanes have in common? They all get the house.
Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?
Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.
Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
Because you can't drink and derive.
Why do Java Programmers wear glasses? Because they don't C#.
Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions.