Thereness jokes
Where did the children go after he stepped on the land mine?
There, there, over there, and over here too.
So my dad tells these jokes and someone posted one on this website so...
How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb? 101, one to hold the light bulb and 100 to spin the house.
There’s also one about a bowling ball in a bath tub he hasn’t told me that though. I'll research that.
I have had it up to here with you.
(Then there Hight.)
I’d make a joke to Fetty Wap on this, but there’s only a 50/50 chance he’ll SEE this.
In my locality, there was an orphanage but everybody in the locality was really sexist too, so they had to change the orphanage into a brothel 'cause everybody took the boys away and nobody was taking the girls and the manager didn't want to waste any 14-year-old pussy, did he?
Why does China have the biggest eyewear?
Because all their eyes are too small.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Lemon.
Haha! Hahahah! Hahahaah!
So I got my sister shampoo for her birthday, and she stood there and threw her wig on the floor.
You look like the type of guy to wash his/her hands after a shower! (And don't write in the comments that there are more than 2 genders.)
We are close to beating the world record of comments on this website (171). Right now, there are 155, so put more comments!
I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"
I love orphans. They're precious.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Yull.
Yull who?
You'll be sorry if you eat all the fruitcake!
I went to the dam to take the dam tour, but the dam tour guide told me there wasn't going to be a dam tour that day. So I was thirsty and I wanted some dam water, but the dam man wouldn't give me any dam water, so I told the dam man to keep his dam water.
What's the difference between school and Hell?
There is no difference.
There's nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
What caused the Great Depression? A lack of comedians.
A teenage guy is taking a girl to a dance. First, he goes to buy her flowers, but there’s a really long line at the florist. Finally, he buys them.
Then, he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a really long line for that, too. After a few hours, he gets the tux.
That night, he picks up the girl and they go to the school for the dance. There’s a long line to get in that goes halfway around the school. A while later, they finally get in. They dance and talk for a while, then the guy gets thirsty, so he goes over to the table to get punch. There is no punch line.
Your dad went to get the milk, but he was actually trying to find his father. He wasn't there.
There's a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.
Why are Americans good at Rubik's Cubes?
They're so good at separating colors.