Thereness jokes
Why are orphans bad at hide and seek?
Because they can’t find their parents.
What happened to the depressed kid who tried to high five a tree?
Answer: He was left there hanging.
Why did the bat fall out of the tree?
It couldn’t hang in there.
Today I told my sis, "Knock knock."
She said, "Who's there?"
I said, "I Eat eat my mop."
She said, "I eat mop poo instead of who."
Knock, knock. Who's there? Susan. Susan who? Season your chicken, it's too plain!
A boy asks a zookeeper, "Why is there a baguette in a cage?"
The zookeeper says, "It's bread in captivity!"
People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...
Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.
There are a lot of upsides to being an orphan.
For one, you never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
What's the difference between milk and a cancer patient?
There's none, they both don't age well.
What do genders and the Twin Towers have in common? There used to be 2, but now they're a sensitive topic...
Today on a drive, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the people living there if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.
My parents are the worst.
Why are there so many black men in the NBA that only want to play basketball on a all black basketball team? because they prefer to suck a long and thick big black dick
There are 206 bones in the human body, but I’d really like to have 207.
Q: Why did the orphan cross the road?
A: To get to the other side to find his parents.
There was no other side of the road.
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
On Halloween you better hide your candy, or else there will be a fella named Big Dick Randy.
If you're bored, just go hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
There's no Asian kids in my class, but it just happens to be the rice store and the pet store just ran out of stock...
Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!
Officer: You OK, kid?
Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.
Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*
When officer leaves:
Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?