Thereness jokes
Why can’t the USA play chess?
Because they lost their two towers.
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
There's a new Viagra and prune juice diet that's out.
Unfortunately, you can't tell if you're coming or going.
Why does a kid never come home after a fight with their parents? Because they never found the key to the house again.
Did you hear? There is a new toy for boys ages 2-10. It's called Jackson. A tiny white doll, with black Jackson. Get it while supplies last.
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
There were two when we were kids, but now it’s a touchy subject.
An Abo walks into a pub with a seagull on his shoulder. The barman asks, "Where did you find that?" The seagull replied, "At the tip, mate, there are lots there."
There are a lot of things that explode... like cars, boats, the Twin Towers.
There are only 2 things I hate in this world:
1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.
Who’s stronger in a relationship, a man or a woman? A woman, because it takes six men to carry him to his grave; it only takes one woman to put him there.
Why was Saudi Arabia sad during 9/11?
Because there were no more planes.
I asked my North Korean friend how it is to live there.
He said he couldn't complain.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Yo mama!
Why are there more female history teachers than male?
Because women like to bring up the past.
What’s the best part about stage four cancer?
There’s no stage five.
My girlfriend died in Tokyo during a tsunami. I was sad, but my friend told me, "Don't worry, there are plenty more in the ocean."
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Luke.
Luke who?
Luke through the keyhole and you’ll see.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting c—
MOO!
What did the mad penis say to the vagina? “Don’t make me come in there!”