Them jokes
Your mother is responsible for all the train drivers that are never ever late. She taught them all to pull out on time.
What do skeletons do with their organs?
They organize them!
My brothers kept annoying me.
I told them I would disembowel them if they kept it up.
It was an empty threat—right after I was done.
Why did the boy leave his chestnuts in the rain?
He wanted them rusted.
People are like trees. They fall when you hit them multiple times with an axe.
How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?
They slash them.
Why did Ronald McDonald go to KFC to destroy them?
My mates threw nuts at the wall, now we call them walnuts.
Hahaha :)
I have so many cash machine jokes.
But none of them seem to work ATM.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One of them gets picked.
Who can jump the highest?
Emos, some of them are still falling.
I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"
I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3
Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."
Why do orphans hate dodgeball?
No one misses them.
You know they say, when you get lemons make lemonade... Well, I took that a little bit too literal.
Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.
But at least lemonade came out!
What's the difference between an orphan and a pencil?
People actually have a use for one of them.
What's the difference between an orphan and a dog?
One of them is actually loved.
You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.
Why can’t balls move? Because no one is there to voice them around.
My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot, and then they bombed him. Now he called them the "Talkwakers."