My nuts hurt; if you pull them, I will scream.
My nuts tickle; scratch them, and I won’t like you no more.
Them Jokes
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because their parents can't watch them!
Dad: Where is my son?
Son: Come join me with musical chairs, except we stand on them.
Dad: Ok, so do we put this round our neck?
Son: YES!
Mum: AHHHHHHHHHHHH
Q: How do you get 50 babies in a bucket?
A: With a blender!
Q: How do you take them out?
A: With Doritos!
I have so many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because their parents aren't there to watch them!
Did you know that if you go into an orphanage and tell them a "yo mama" joke, they won’t get it?
Why do orphans love baseball?
Because it gives them a home to run to.
Why did Ronald McDonald go to KFC to destroy them?
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have anyone to call them "daddy."
How many babies does it take to paint the walls red?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Why do orphans have no home?
Because they didn't have a family to give them one.
Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.
Why did you put your dirty ass feet in my grits without telling me all this?
Because I forgot to wash and dry them with a paper towel.
I had some puns about construction, but I'm still working on them.
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.
Some people are such "treasures" that you just want to bury them.
A blind kid was talking to me because he was getting bullied...
I told him, "Just tell them what you see!"
Why did the skydiver bring a backup parachute?
In case the first one wanted to "cut ties" with them mid-air.
One time, I worked at the zoo and I was feeding the monkeys.
And one of them μяɨɲąţ€ď on me.
And I went to the hospital and got a bloody nose the next day.
